In the late summer of 1992, the summer before my senior year in college, I decided I wanted to see the country by train. I had an uncle living in the San Joaquin Valley of California and I thought I would go for a visit. I wanted to at least see the flyover states even if it was flying by in the middle of the night by my window. So, I took the two-and-a-half-day trek from Washington, DC to Chicago to Los Angeles. I left on August 11th. A couple of days earlier, I had spoken to Adriane, my off and on girlfriend. We spoke of possibly getting back together since she had just returned from a sabbatical in Italy. It was the last time I would speak to her.
On the train back to Washington, DC, I met a young woman from Germany. We spent two days together on the train and struck up a friendship. She disembarked in Chicago but, we agreed to meet again. The following July, as a graduation gift, I left Dulles International Airport to spend the summer in Germany. I arrived after a red-eye flight to the city of Hannover, Germany. We traveled all over Germany that summer, but my “base” of operations was Hannover. I spent many days on my own exploring the modern city. I always had been interested in football and discovered that Hannover had a team with their stadium not too far away by public transport. Die Roten (The Reds), as they are known, had just won the DFB-Pokal Cup as a 2. Bundesliga club in May beating 1st tier, Borussia Monchengladbach on penalties. This was the first time a lower division club had won the coveted cup. As I became enamored by the city of Hannover, which had to be completely rebuilt after World War II, I went to a few matches and began to follow the ’96.’
One of the most seminal events in the club’s history occurred ten years ago this Sunday. On November 10th, 2009, their goalkeeper, Robert Enke, died by suicide. He was 32 years old. Sadly, as a mental health professional, when I heard the news I was not as surprised as everyone else. Like football imitating life itself, the issues of depression and suicide had been largely ignored until it hits close to the heart. In 2019, I am happy to report that awareness of these issues in football and in the life around us has improved, but the “patient is better, but not cured.”
Robert Enke was born in former East Germany on August 24th, 1977. He was the youngest of three children to who would eventually split up. Robert started playing youth football at the age of eight and was quickly noticed as an exceptional talent. The young boy started as a striker on his youth club and then switched permanently to the goalkeeper. After a stunning performance at a youth tournament, he was picked up by club Carl Zeiss Jena at the age of nine.
He rose rapidly in the youth ranks at Jena and was picked by the German national team in 1993 to play on their U-15 squad. Robert had an impressive debut against England in a 0-0 draw at Wembley. He also met his wife Teresa during this time period. Robert had noticed her at a train stop and decided to wait several hours for her just to talk to her for the first time. They remained a couple until the end.
Signs of depression were present when Robert was a teenager, however, it could have easily been written off as teenage ‘blues.’ There were periods of depressed mood, anxiety, isolation, agitation, and decreased energy throughout his adolescence. He stated, in an interview after a match, this telling statement:
“Often I don’t think about the world, but sometimes I have the feeling the Apocalypse is coming soon.”
There were times that Robert, filled with sadness and self-doubt, would stay in bed for a week missing school and training. He was filled with intense moments of extreme shifts in thinking as he vacillated about his performance on the pitch from being the best to the worst. Aside from his girlfriend, Teresa, he remained socially disconnected from his teammates and family. Robert made a few friends.
Early in his professional career, Enke was filled with an incredible lack of self-esteem. In one instance, after a difficult start of a match, he begged his coach to take him off the field at half-time. When he had an inauspicious start with the U-18 club team, he requested to be moved back to the U-16s. Despite these bumps, he would take advantage of opportunities that were given to him to advance. This would land him with his first Bundesliga club, Borussia Monchengladbach, in the summer of 1996. Robert made his debut in August of 1998 in a 3-0 victory over Schalke 04 after the club’s first-team goalie ruptured his Achilles tendon. Unfortunately, for him, Borussia did miserably that season. In one week, he allowed fifteen goals as the club eventually was relegated.
Prone to anxiety attacks, Robert attempted to back out of his newly signed contract with Portuguese club Benfica literally an hour later after an episode in his Lisbon hotel room. Claiming that his girlfriend, Teresa, had fallen ill they left that night to return to Germany missing his introduction to the press. He eventually came back to Lisbon where Enke had a successful tenure despite the team’s mediocre performance. However, now in a foreign country as a young adult, he continued to be plagued by periods of sadness, social isolation, negative self-esteem, anger outbursts and lack of energy.
In 1999, Robert debuted for the German national team where he would have eight full caps over ten years. He married his long-time sweetheart, Teresa, in an outdoor ceremony in western Germany the following year. In 2002 , he signed for Barcelona, however, started only one match for the super club. Eventually, Enke was loaned out to two clubs in Turkey and nearly quit football as his career stalled. It was believed that he suffered his first major depressive episode soon after a traumatic incident in his last match in Turkey where he was pummeled with lighters and bottles thrown by fans after being blamed for a 3-0 loss. In January 2004, he was loaned out again to the second-tier Spanish club, CD Tenerife, where he resurrected his career. That summer he finally got the opportunity he was waiting for – to sign with a club in his homeland.
Enke signed with Hannover 96 that summer. He became their number one goalkeeper right away. The veteran goalkeeper would win accolades from fans and colleagues alike. He was named best goalie in the Bundesliga twice while at Hannover, after his first season and after his last. Robert made over 180 appearances for The Reds over five seasons in both domestic and European competition.
Despite his success returning to his homeland, depressive spells continued to strike the steadfast and calm goalkeeper. These episodes would include weeks of depressed mood, anxiety, decreased energy, sleep disturbances, social isolation and negative self-concept.
Tragedy struck in 2006. That year, Teresa and Robert’s first daughter Lara died from complications from a heart birth defect. For a man already prone to periods of depression, this tragedy was something that Robert Enke, star footballer, would find tremendously difficult to recover from.
He continued to find success on the pitch despite worsening episodes of depression. He became club captain and continued to be called up to the German national team. Ironically, in his final full season with Hannover 96, he was awarded again as the Bundesliga’s best goalkeeper.
What very few people knew, as it was a stigma in the world of professional football, was that Robert was being treated for depression by a psychiatrist. He started his treatment in 2003. It was kept very much as a secret as what probably ran through his mind was: “What would people think? A star sportsman who is unstable? How is that possible? He must be weak.” The truth is that it is very much possible because depression has nothing to do with success or money or lifestyle. It has to do with brain chemistry and stress.
Robert Enke was on track to being named the number one goalkeeper for the German national team at the 2010 World Cup. He was captain of his professional club. He had been a professional footballer his entire adult life. He was a husband and in January of 2009, he and his wife adopted a daughter.
On November 8th, 2009, Robert played his last match for the 96 in a 2-2 draw at the AMD Arena in Hannover against Hamburg. Two days later, he stepped in front of an express commuter train near his home in a suburb of Hannover. He had left behind a suicide note.
Robert’s unexpected shocking death rattled Hannover 96 and German soccer. Thousands flocked to Hannover’s stadium to lay flowers, pictures, and candles in his honor. A memorial service was held in the 44,000 seats AMD Arena for supporters and the public to mourn the loss of the popular footballer. It was at capacity.
The Reds have never been the same since. The club has fallen on hard times with financial troubles, bad ownership, and horrific behavior by ultra groups. They are currently mid-table in 2. Bundesliga after being relegated after a miserable 2018-19 season.
I met Scottie when I was fifteen years old when I followed the beautiful auburn haired girl into the wrong French class to ask for her name. She and I got to know each other amazingly well and we became a couple. Scottie became my first love. I learned that she was from the small town of Marion, South Carolina and had been adopted as an infant. Like myself, she was an athlete and won accolades for being the first girl to play for the local boys Little League baseball team. Several weeks into the start of our relationship she handed me a note stating the following:
“I get depressed a lot. I get very sad. I often feel like killing myself because I can’t take it all.”
I turned her note into the school guidance counselor because I was scared and did not know what else to do to help her. Scottie eventually received treatment for major depression. It was then that I made the decision to not become a history teacher, but to be a therapist.
At first, she was angry for “turning her in”, but eventually I was forgiven, and we continued our teenage romance. She continued to struggle with her illness and was hospitalized several times during significant episodes where she would engage in self-harming or parasuicidal behaviors. When Scottie turned eighteen her family requested that she leave Marion and moved her to Myrtle Beach. The year was 1989 and I was starting college as a psychology major. Throughout all of this, we stayed together. A year later, Scottie changed her name to Adriane after her birth mother whom she found in Louisiana.
In 1991, Adriane and I broke it off. We were in the midst of a long distance relationship and I was unable to manage dealing with her rapid cycling mood disturbances, increasing self-destructive behaviors, and escalating alcohol abuse. Her adopted family decided the best thing for Adriane was to send her to school – in Italy.
We met a couple of days before she left for Italy in a hotel in South Carolina. I was taking a tour of the south by car.
Adriane came back home in late July the following year. We spoke on the phone days before I got on the train in Washington DC bound for California.
There has been always a stigma in life and society around mental illness. As football imitates life and society, this stigma being fueled by machismo multiplied. Robert Enke’s death by suicide broke open the seal of awareness of the issue in the sport, yet it is still present.
Major depression is characterized by the following symptoms over the course of a two week or longer period:
Depressed mood most of the day, every day
Fatigue or loss of energy almost every day
Feelings of worthlessness (poor self-esteem) or guilt almost every day
Impaired concentration, indecisiveness
Insomnia or hypersomnia (excessive sleeping) almost every day
Markedly diminished interest or pleasure in almost all activities nearly every day (called anhedonia, this symptom can be indicated by reports from significant others)
Restlessness or feeling slowed down
Recurring thoughts of death or suicide
Significant weight loss or gain (a change of more than 5% of body weight in a month)
Major depression (or clinical depression) is a medical condition. It can be both episodic and/or chronic. It is a medical condition caused by the significant reduction of brain chemicals present in the body (especially serotonin). This reduction in chemicals can be caused by a combination of genetics and stress.
The stress-diathesis model of depression suggests that everyone is susceptible to depression at varying degrees based on genetics and other biological factors. It also theorizes that stress in the environment may reach a level where it goes beyond the threshold of an individual’s level of susceptibility. When this occurs, then one begins to develop symptoms of clinical depression.
Robert Enke was a professional football player in major European and international football with all the accompanying requirements and benefits. He also had significantly stressful events including the loss of his infant daughter. Is it of any surprise that he would suffer from depression? It shouldn’t.
Why?
Because major depression knows no labels. It crosses all of them. It ignores age, race, gender, nationality, religion, sexual orientation, gender identification, occupation, and socio-economic status. It is a medical condition which means it can affect anybody – including a professional football player.
The statistics are staggering. According to the National Alliance for Mental Illness (NAMI), depression affects 17.7 million Americans (7.2% of the population) each year. This means that nearly eighteen million Americans or seven percent of the population will suffer at least one major depressive episode every year. The statistics world-wide for the prevalence of depression are like the U.S., especially in most of northern and western Europe. This means that since this is a medical condition that knows no label or category, then an eighteen team league (like the Bundesliga) that has twenty three first team players each would have 29 players suffering from major depression during any given season. That is more than one player per club.
To make matters more daunting, major depression is not the only medical mental illness. For example, another 45 million Americans suffer from an anxiety disorder each year, per NAMI. Robert Enke also suffered panic attacks, a symptom of an anxiety disorder.
People die from depression.
According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP), suicide is currently the 10th leading cause of death in the United States. In 2017, 47,173 people died by suicide in the United States (the figure is nearly 800,000 people world-wide) and is double the homicide rate. It is the 2nd leading cause of death of individuals in the US ages 10 to 34 (Robert Enke was 32). Ninety percent of people who die by suicide were suffering from a diagnosable mental health condition. Per the AFSP, in 2017, men died by suicide 3.54 times more often than women and 50.6% of all suicides involved a firearm.
It’s not getting better. The suicide rate in the U.S. has increased by 31% since 2001.
Research in suicide prevention has taught us some warning signs that people should consider when they suspect someone may be at significant risk of ending their life:
Past history – The best predictor of future behavior is past. If someone has a history of suicide attempts or self-harming behaviors, they are more likely to do it again. The reason for this is that with any other behavior when someone does a behavior one time it breaks the seal making it easier to do it again. Once someone engages in multiple self-harming behaviors, they become more and more desensitized to that behavior, thus becoming more likely to do it again.
Social disconnectedness – Research has indicated that people who have little to no adaptive social supports from family, friends, co-workers, professionals, or others are at a significantly higher risk for suicide.
Feeling like a burden – When people start thinking that the people in their lives would be better off without them in it or that others would be relieved with their death because “they won’t have to deal with my problems anymore” then they are at higher risk.
Substance abuse – Substance abuse and dependency is a significant risk factor of suicide for two reasons. One, drugs and alcohol lower inhibition and judgement. Two, alcohol and drug withdrawal symptoms can be so severe that either people overcompensate to relieve them leading to overdose or kill themselves outright to relive the pain.
Firearms – As stated, over half of suicide deaths have been by firearms. The mortality rate of a suicide attempt by firearms is over 90%. The mortality rate of a suicide attempt by hanging is around 50%. By pills? 2%.
Luckily, there is hope. Like with most medical conditions, major depression is treatable, especially if caught early. Through a combination of a thorough assessment by a mental health professional, therapy from a licensed therapist, and possibly medications most people can get significant relief from depression. However, they must take that very difficult step. They have to not only be aware of the problem, but they have to reach out.
In the world of professional football there has been more awareness. For example, after Robert’s death, the DFB (the German FA) along with several clubs created the Robert Enke Foundation in order to raise awareness of depression and suicide in football and in life and society in general. Many professional football clubs have hired in-house sports psychologists to help assess players for performance related concerns such as depression in order to provide the right treatments and supports for those in need. However, these are typically at larger clubs and only at the top tier of players. Major depression needs to be caught early and special attention needs to be focused on the youth academy systems where despite improvement in awareness, it is still marginalized.
Though despite more awareness of depression, suicide, and mental health in general through all forms of media, funding for treatment through public services has largely been woeful and private insurance companies only recently have had to be forced to cover mental health the same as physical health. Thus, many people who may have wanted to reach out for help have not been able to find services that are readily available and affordable. People who do not get the mental health services they need typically will fall into deeper despair or worse.
Yet, as in life, in football the stigma remains. Many players are worried about showing any type of vulnerability or weakness to their teammates or club for fear that they will be labeled as “fragile” or as a “head case.” This type of labeling (like most all labeling) can be destructive in multiple ways including the player’s livelihood. Footballers live in constant fear that their clubs will not re-sign them or that other players will ostracize them if they knew the extent of their emotional turmoil. Players also live with the fear that how they may be treated by the general public, and more specifically ultras from the club’s opponents if their condition became known and almost everything it seems in professional football is somehow found out. Another important issue is that many people are taught that you keep all problems “in house” and to not let “strangers” know your “business.” Though this is an archaic attitude, when I see racial abuse by spectators in stadiums in 2019, I believe that archaic attitudes do exist. However, lack of awareness and acceptance of depression and suicide is a very dangerous thing – for those who suffer from it, but also those around them.
On August 14th, 1992, three days after I left on a train to California, five days after I spoke to her last, Adriane Anthony took a combination of alcohol, prescription pain killers, and Tylenol. She was found the next morning by her adopted parents still alive. The 21-year-old woman was rushed to the hospital. It was too late. On August 21st, 1992, the day I met a young woman from Germany who led me to Hannover, Die Roten, and Robert Enke, Adriane passed away – by suicide. Her tombstone in an old southern cemetery near a strip mall in Marion, South Carolina reads:
“Peace. At Last.”
When I heard of the suicide of Hannover 96 goalkeeper. Robert Enke on November 10th, 2009 I remembered Adriane. I remembered that things come full circle. I remembered that life does imitate football and football imitates life.
I remember. We all remember. I will never forget. We will never forget.
Hannover 96 and a number of German clubs this weekend will be remembering the passing of Robert Enke in pre-match moments of silence supporting the Robert Enke Foundation.
If you or a loved one is considering suicide, please call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline (NSPL) at 1-800-273-TALK (8255). The NSPL will route your call to one of 161 local 24/7 toll-free contact centers to assist you. I happen to work at one of those centers as a supervisor. We get over 800 calls daily.
Author: Keith Lisenbee, mental health professional, writer, and soccer enthusiast is from Atlanta, Georgia by way of Virginia. I was in love with soccer until Agüero destroyed my soul and Manchester United's title hopes in 2012. I came back for the World Cup in 2014 and through the use of DVR, I am back with the force of orange Tic Tacs and IPAs covering the EPL, Bundesliga, MLS, and La Liga. You can follow me on Twitter @keith_lisenbee and Instagram @lisenbeekeith got more random soccer thoughts.